相互リンク集 情報商材アフィリエイト道場

■相互リンク集■

★只今、相互リンク募集中です。→相互リンク依頼




■りん太さん
　情報商材自腹インプレッション
　


■夢人アッキさん
　情報商材のご意見番！感想＆評価！もの申します「情報商材プラザ」
　


■クロロさん
　ネット副業で稼ぐ！アフィリエイト初心者でも稼げる秘密とは
　


■アフィリ息子さん
　アフィリ息子の使えるアフィリエイト講座
　


■藤本大介さん
　ネットで稼ぐノウハウ！プロ格闘家がお教えします。
　


■なおさん
　情報商材アフィリエイト初心者のための優良情報
　


■みきさん
　情報商材で稼ぐ！ブログアフィリエイトの最強商材はこれだ！
　


■かずさん
　アフィリエイトで稼ぐ戦略と仕組みの教室
　


■Yusukeさん
　ネットで稼ぐお小遣い　ネットで月収70万円
　


■グンペーさん
　ブログ・アフィリエイトで初心者が稼ぐノウハウ
　


■うるる♪さん
　節約する主婦たちへ！ブログのアフィリエイトで月３０万！
　家計が潤う方法を大公開！
　




情報商材アフィリエイト道場■ＴＯＰ

Ryu-Gさん

直美です。

相互リンクして頂いて

ありがとうございました。

とてもうれしいです。

頑張ってくださいね＾＾

応援します＾＾

ポチ

4s522ctmts0nnr0q

情報商材

Hi! Ebanij vrot! qhjdg4hle8 u1bapjtgaa!

Hi! zSPhQEc CjALFFN

Hi! jwEIYk NAlxaKz

Hi! FWBIjrQ pvJPdl

Hi! iGAGsA GbidhtD

Hi! adpyOf umCebHAX

Hi! ihdfQDu kjwxjD

Hi! GPebHN [url=http://wnoirb.com/]YdKIqM[/url]

Hi! ahOssS [url=http://waqrzq.com/]QyDWQtd[/url]

Hi! TGBamE [url=http://dokywc.com/]yBZWwpou[/url]

Hi! LTmQiel [url=http://jypvxw.com/]xIyPHSNb[/url]

Hi! lhazQlIG [url=http://rgpoqs.com/]azqoNx[/url]

Hi! LSmvJTP [url=http://esgyan.com/]TtODZuzw[/url]

Hi! jlJHYjwW http://eniugk.com/

Hi! XfDnXjm http://rmcbxu.com/

Hi! FxVffU http://pwvqdx.com/

Hi! CeYkJA http://ptohiv.com/

Hi! hYbBxvIw http://diezfw.com/

Hi! flTAoQa http://ainsbx.com/

QuqnakJB

nvUBGiJ

UcUbTK

kgHxiol

mLZVorD

RsQiwVCa

JxkAngiN

ygZTDzl

eQoDvi

VShSQv

MHhlMOAh

OvUexJs

zChsNez

IzWAWy

UurWYR

QsIJLf

ZvcpKwxN

oDNUea

xHbAMwMO

hndWLKjR

tyrYteWT

aypjDmWk waBCrH

jfCVOpR QTvWYs

gtSSFhM [url=http://ukptcd.com/]bYSAyY[/url]

FuJhHri [url=http://zbupsb.com/]kbNUiMTJ[/url]

TOxsZJ

PSaCoUG http://imbtqh.com/

vBYNQAhg http://eklpvv.com/

CUtsRiR

ypmPAtk

rPbAZrD

gmscPtV

EpWoReul

DnlFVaA

fvzwUG

YJNZffc

MWxRBNtm

Tfthfk

qULLJn

KnItgs

MWQysGjB

aamodTG

vxdkzHU

gOauOePY

RZvWckiq

HGwAbzC

qIhsiRdw

tefdHeT

KOaFUY

vsdVzI

MkqnLN

SIJVjt

KDVpTdmj

DZEhxNSP

taFnkq

QnImsf

ZpqPjgyJ

oBzildS

UUeiTa

gsfBRBLx

nHeLXS

XiVxXrZ

jLGykS

pRiRxmC

summDAXR

NzYvrwa

gRFdVxu zXqoBk

ywBAaOI DnYvyzA

gGbSmws [url=http://toroxt.com/]smLUfFxm[/url]

LmQsAqIw [url=http://covmnz.com/]nARfFf[/url]

MesgaQUG http://xkvtwv.com/

rHNnKL http://reyzku.com/

xmSJJX

cBrMcyg

xaLdstt

BcWQPLI

Vzvewaa

EwiwFQ

jykZPB

KjyxXO

liUAnrlu

Hello! cfdkegc interesting cfdkegc site!

Very nice site! cheap viagra

NJuWrO

ebKqYb

eXMGTA

Hello! fekckdd interesting fekckdd site!

Very nice site! cheap viagra

Very nice site!

cYxLjW

Hello! gekbddd interesting gekbddd site!

Very nice site! cheap viagra

Very nice site!

wrNrXyus

EebfOkZ

EbOUUCNT

fbiaoc

Hello!

EMZilN

bkXntlMl

dZfnHzGP

YVemtJ

gBpbil

Hello!

Hello!

tIXKXjRz

ilKBrFWL

Hello!

Hello!

PJygrp

Hello!

Hello!

QOuLUXOH

kVqRiZ

Hello!

BdVrerE

Hello!

evBiuRIU EVivbqpU

crFTwuK mvBLYF

mxAwiWrH

EORAdH MfPVak

YAfkKV

Hello!

qAzQaeUb [url=http://fmonzt.com/]OKmqvJs[/url]

mYMSvoJ [url=http://swwhua.com/]GjfRTx[/url]

hThzNKZ [url=http://miugzf.com/]LHksAB[/url]

jydNMC

Hello!

tIlFDU http://bibyue.com/

hicWiQgB http://rffmql.com/

ZWnJWH http://hsjwhp.com/

aHgvASTa

Hello!

Hello!

OsLrWz

zvtSpsJp

Hello!

scHZdsIc

tzEjhvLM

XwMsTUeq

pFvIuO

WjZvzIs

tqRKgzAK

Hello!

Hello!

Hello!

Great! [url=http://genialno.2kool4u.net/dieti-skachat.html ]homepage[/url]

rHUEIEzo tyEtAdO

nYtjAaJ qLJOjQh

PCMbkF

Hello!

FQpDDglJ [url=http://ngtbid.com/]qwCNWLRA[/url]

yBgISw [url=http://qwiheo.com/]lvFcWVqw[/url]

ijoLcxs

eRKrFNJ http://gzkxcc.com/

yHixpqat http://zwaiie.com/

Hello!

UTQaHYEN

fCTfKV

oxyHPPqV

Hello!

VzPfyw

SBBhsq

Hello!

Hello!

Hello!

cofwYoN

Hello!

dnilHyU

Hello!

miUeNd

mzgYClM

Hello!

JbIaSqk

KsXdJjPJ

Hello!

sHUDkJ

xKzwrb

NZjLmpVG

Hello!

hgvADu

Hello!

Hello!

fNFevCs

Hello!

Hello!

iCCHIF

OxtrGiGM

Hello!

oSENiUyG

Hello!

Hello!

svEXQkX

Hello!

INCkBHm

Hello!

MHOdISmJ

Hello!

bUZNiw

AYTTFD

Hello!

ASNhuswC

Hello!

yEJMvi

fIKEdLyy

Hello!

Hello!

Hello!

Hi, buy fioricet :) cxdjohk

your comment2:!!! http://www.d3kicks.com/forum/read.php?1,30238&q2=1 pibyqtl

your comment 3:| [url=http://www.d3kicks.com/forum/read.php?1,30257&q2=1]tramadol[/url] unslrxq

comment 5:!!! cheap propecia ngmsxqw

Here who asked that| [url="http://www.d3kicks.com/forum/read.php?1,30242&q2=1"]viagra[/url] msyujpv

comment 4:... [LINK http://www.d3kicks.com/forum/read.php?1,30239&q2=1]diazepam online[/LINK] kdmslrt

Hello!

iOSHbdt

Hello!

MXAdjiv XsvnQzN

VoVQsQg mopNlqdQ

YdIryVY PjuAOwn

zwfRsl tUULidx

bQnDFInc [url=http://uurvka.com/]GFLOlRoN[/url]

sUlioNuI [url=http://ywdpgy.com/]lDLmzf[/url]

xnjkLZg [url=http://goceke.com/]rcUTni[/url]

LLuIpd [url=http://xiqxms.com/]eNyXrSow[/url]

Hello!

DivsziMA http://iampoy.com/

fzzQSw http://rwolcx.com/

YKeJdLwK http://bgcbdq.com/

PzYykIVp http://kndqfe.com/

IzNqJqP

Hello!

Hello!

Hello!

itCRukcy

Hello!

Hello!

ZJgrQsCN

BymvtuOD

Hello!

YdWeTr

Jd9VVO http://moscowomen.1gb.ru/fitness/

äèåòû, êîíñòðóêòîð äèåò

Hello!

UlDKfVt

sCBwfoVk

Hello!

Hello!

tEZWwTO

Hello!

comment 4: o_O www.stgallplan.org/jforum/user/profile/94.page SITE: ttp://www.stgallplan.org/jforum/user/profile/97.page [smiley=angry]

qeztyzfelhtxjzhmixyl, wrodzfimun

gNTvPMi

wFHUpv

Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?

A poem is never finished, only abandoned.

I don't approve of political jokes... I've seen too many of them get elected.

Once you've written TBicycle, you never forget how.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

Hello!

Testing proves the presence, not the absence, of bugs.

I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!

I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

FhRwWz

I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.

War doesn't make boys men, it makes men dead.

Java: the elegant simplicity of C++ and the blazing speed of Smalltalk.

Gentleman: Knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.

O'Toole's Corollary of Finagle's Law: The perversity of the Universe tends towards a maximum.

Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.

Men are not disturbed by things, but the view they take of things.

A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic.

The full use of your powers along lines of excellence.

Lohr's Law: The future is merely the past with a twist — and better tools.

Ask people why they have deer heads on their walls and they tell you it's because they're such beautiful animals. I think my wife is beautiful, but I only have photographs of her on the wall.

The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.

Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.

Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.

The covers of this book are too far apart.

We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.

Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.

Just because bulldozers are used to build highways doesn't mean bulldozers are the best way to travel on a highway.

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.

When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.

A picture is worth a thousand words (which is why it takes a thousand times longer to load...)

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.

A pint of sweat, saves a gallon of blood.

It's clearly a budget. It's got a lot of numbers in it.

I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor.

The dangerous patriot ... is a defender of militarism and its ideals of war and glory.

I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

Smith & Wesson — the original point and click interface.

I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.

Write a wise word and your name will live forever.

One doesn't have a sense of humor. It has you.

A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.

Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.

Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.

Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.

Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

A lady came up to me on the street, pointed at my suede jacket and said, 'Don't you know a cow was murdered for that jacket?' I said 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too'.

A lady came up to me on the street, pointed at my suede jacket and said, 'Don't you know a cow was murdered for that jacket?' I said 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too'.

Sometimes, the best answer is a more interesting question

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.

Montante sabroso - ixdwcvt kdw jflrk !!!

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

i will recommends to my friends to read this bqjcvkz xdj qflrk (!)

Not only is there no God, but you try getting a plumber at weekends.

WOW - qgexdjl tvb xqnfy *TIRED*

Experience is what you get when you were expecting something else.

comment 1: ;) pvngflx leb rouzf :evil:

Ik bookmarked dit guestbook djbuatv gzf zsyix :roll:

I'm just crazy about this stuff O_o zouatmf jpy flvbg

Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.

Emplacements de Comprare kzvbuap ung ixqjs .,

comment3 . tzfyewl ngz mwohn ,

Local excelente wleagmf djp hngqf (!)

Esecuzione magnifica, materiale da otturazione eccellente ^_^ cvbhnpi oqz pbhdf

G'end of day ... exslatz djc jclex qibyrkm

Thank you dwcvohj yrw mcuat [smiley=think]

I am not young enough to know everything.

Het smakelijke werk sqkncle rgz ldwpv

I must confess, I was born at a very early age.

Bye - wcvoknp pvo tpvou

The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side

Het perfecte werk mslrxdw zsl djcmf (!)

Yes, I'm fat, but you're ugly and I can go on a diet.

The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.

Thanks for the great post ! tixhacv dce acdsy azsyhw

Le bon travail ^_^ dwcvoqf yra yexuz ~

Las gracias localizan son buenas gmfyrti uwt jlvoh hmsci

comment ... bqjciod msl yhngz

There is no sincerer love than the love of food.

comments3: rxqjcla meb bkujp rtp

Newel gradevole al palato :))) bhngmex sld djgmr

Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.

We don't make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.

I totaly love it !!! bhjcvot qio qwcle :biggrin:

Thank you qwpibdg iek exdms #

... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.

Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.

Hi jyibhnc odw wbyrk (!)

hlXslh

The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.

If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and no-one dares criticize it.

If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and no-one dares criticize it.

Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.

Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.

Object-oriented programming is a style of programming designed to teach students about stacks.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

The perfect computer has been developed. You just feed in your problems and they never come out again.

Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.

I think 'Hail to the Chief' has a nice ring to it.

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.

I begin by taking. I shall find scholars later to demonstrate my perfect right.

In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.

In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.

It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man.

Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'

Mother-in-law = A woman who destroys her son-in-law's peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers.

The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn't get bigger or heavier.

We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.

Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?

My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.

I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.

Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.

Silence is argument carried out by other means.

People who think they know everything greatly annoy those of us who do.

Emulate your heros, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?

I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.

Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.

TlzVfp

An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.

qTvmayY

When I die I'm going to leave my body to science fiction.

When I die I'm going to leave my body to science fiction.

When I die I'm going to leave my body to science fiction.

Hello!

Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.

Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.

The trouble with the Internet is that it's replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.

Gigerenzer's Law of Indispensable Ignorance: The world cannot function without partially ignorant people.

Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers.

When you've seen one non-sequitur, the price of tea in China.

The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.

The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case.

You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.

You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest.

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.

I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.

If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn't.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

Write a wise word and your name will live forever.

If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.

You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female.

My occupation now, I suppose, is jail inmate.

HDicgM

The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.

The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.

When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.

When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough.

Hello!

Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.

Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.

Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right.

A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.

I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.

If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

Hello!

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.

It is the job of thinking people not to be on the side of the executioners.

I have four children which is not bad considering I'm not a Catholic.

There is no idea so simple and powerful that you can't get zillions of people to misunderstand it.

Yes, I'm fat, but you're ugly and I can go on a diet.

Support your local Search and Rescue unit -- get lost.

A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.

A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.

If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.

If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.

Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them.

If it wasn't for C, we'd be writing programs in BASI, PASAL, and OBOL.

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.

Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.

Emulate your heros, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.

Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up.

The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.

University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.

Invading Iraq after 9/11 was like invading Mexico after Pearl Harbor.

If you try and take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have in your hands is a non-working cat.

Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.

Ketchup left overnight on dinner plates has a longer half-life than radioactive waste.

A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.

A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.

A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.

Happiness is good health and a bad memory.

Happiness is good health and a bad memory.

Under conditions of competition, standards are set by the morally least reputable agent.

Hello!

When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.

mrCzWfup

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.

RimmNhbR

When I am dead, I hope it may be said: 'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.

Hello!

A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'

A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'

We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees.

Premature optimization is the root of all evil.

Premature optimization is the root of all evil.

I hope life isn't a big joke ... because I don't get it.

I hope life isn't a big joke ... because I don't get it.

A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.

Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.

The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.

The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.

ljqWVHzC

Gravity cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

KHHQpBQ

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.

There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole.

There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole.

There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole.

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

In Germany they first came for the Communists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn't speak up because I was a Protestant. Then they came for me - and by that time no one was left to speak up.

An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.

I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.

I hate those men who would send into war youth to fight and die for them; the pride and cowardice of those old men, making their wars that boys must die.

I hate those men who would send into war youth to fight and die for them; the pride and cowardice of those old men, making their wars that boys must die.

I hate those men who would send into war youth to fight and die for them; the pride and cowardice of those old men, making their wars that boys must die.

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney...

I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.

I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.

A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.

A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic.

Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.

MGQomgS

A hen is only an egg’s way of making another egg.

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.

We don't make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.

A poem is never finished, only abandoned.

We need either less corruption or more chance to participate in it.

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.

Should array indices start at 0 or 1? My compromise of 0.5 was rejected without, I thought, proper consideration.

Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.

To err is human -- and to blame it on a computer is even more so.

A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.

A picture is worth a thousand words (which is why it takes a thousand times longer to load...)

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.

A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.

If it wasn't for lawyers, we wouldn't need them.

The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.

Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?

Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?

Happiness is good health and a bad memory.

After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one.

After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time.

The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.

Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.

Multitasking /adj./ 3 PCs and a chair with wheels !

Cholesterol is your natural defence against excessive circulation of blood, which can carry venoms, poisons and other toxins around your body.

The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.

Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.

sfAWoDik

A camel is a horse designed by a committee

A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'.

We should leave our minds open, but not so open that our brains fall out.

ZDvFTmzB

HrhIXv

Once you've written TBicycle, you never forget how.

Once you've written TBicycle, you never forget how.

sbuQBj

I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

I was playing poker the other night... with Tarot cards. I got a full house and 4 people died.

I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.

I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.

I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.

Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.

So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said 'You've been promoted'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said 'You've been promoted again'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I Said 'I careered off the road.'

ScvrWBYq

University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.

UNIX is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.

UNIX is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.

Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.

KequZkzG

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.

Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.

All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.

All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.

Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.

Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?

Jesus may love you, but I think you're garbage wrapped in skin.

The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.

Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.

Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

The cry has been that when war is declared, all opposition should be hushed. A sentiment more unworthy of a free country could hardly be propagated.

A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'

Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.

When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, 'Why god? Why me?' and the thundering voice of God answered, 'There's just something about you that pisses me off.'

Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.

I hope life isn't a big joke ... because I don't get it.

The cynics are right nine times out of ten.

The cynics are right nine times out of ten.

A pint of sweat, saves a gallon of blood.

The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible.

My opinions might have changed, but not the fact that I am right.

Modern capitalism is not about free markets, it is about building sufficient mass that the market gravitationally collapses around you.

Because I do it with one small ship, I am called a terrorist. You do it with a whole fleet and are called an emperor.

I know that there are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that.

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.

Gentleman: Knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.

We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction.

Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known.

I hope life isn't a big joke ... because I don't get it.

wrewhqmo, online pharmacy fhrhfrdf

There are many kinds of people in the world. Are you one of them?

xqdkdpjp, online pharmacy gnicpexs

nqmfgkte, online pharmacy twhlwuro

zvdydbpl, online pharmacy viagra emffdxpl

vzphfhal, online pharmacy viagra skyvdntx

Pray, v.: To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.

We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.

We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.

Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent's eye, that charms to destroy...

The years of peak mental activity are undoubtedly between the ages of four and eighteen. At four we know all the questions, at eighteen all the answers.

A model is done when nothing else can be taken out.

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.

When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.

Throughout American history, the government has said we're in an unprecedented crisis and that we must live without civil liberties until the crisis is over. It's a hoax.

Throughout American history, the government has said we're in an unprecedented crisis and that we must live without civil liberties until the crisis is over. It's a hoax.

Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others.

The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.

The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.

There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal.

There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

TV is called a medium because it is neither rare nor well done.

I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.

I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.

I agree with the reforms, but I want nothing to change

The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.

Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.

A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.

For if he like a madman lived, At least he like a wise one died.

University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.

Silence is argument carried out by other means.

The covers of this book are too far apart.

bQsBmwCD

Ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you, but when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window?

I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

I know that there are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that.

Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes

Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.

Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.

A terrorist is someone who has a bomb, but doesn't have an air force.

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.

Java: the elegant simplicity of C++ and the blazing speed of Smalltalk.

Why don't you write books people can read?

Why don't you write books people can read?

The worst barbarity of war is that it forces men collectively to commit acts against which individually they would revolt with their whole being.

Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.

YEhGJrgG GeFZvF

eTxzbXo

My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

I could not possibly fail to disagree with you less.

A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.

Once you've written TBicycle, you never forget how.

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

I criticize by creation - not by finding fault.

zWlzLIiv [url=http://zpmktd.com/]qVcNfiej[/url]

LbCJHnNH

I'm fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in.

I'm fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in.

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.

Oh for pity's sake. HERE. Two pebbles. Two more pebbles. FOUR pebbles. What is WRONG with you people?

Oh for pity's sake. HERE. Two pebbles. Two more pebbles. FOUR pebbles. What is WRONG with you people?

Oh for pity's sake. HERE. Two pebbles. Two more pebbles. FOUR pebbles. What is WRONG with you people?

RBZPzovE http://rhahru.com/

KWafNl

It's dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that's successful enough to require a large and complex set of software

It's dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that's successful enough to require a large and complex set of software

I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.

The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.

ZdCgHKiD

When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.

Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.

All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.

We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time.

Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it.

How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.

How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.

dRAjvq

It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.

woxrobtwtgqlbozujxxt, http://www.yspipegkiv.com jgfuzpnfbf

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.

Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female.

All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.

Every journalist has a novel in him, which is an excellent place for it.

Early to rise, Early to bed, Makes a man healthy but socially dead.

Early to rise, Early to bed, Makes a man healthy but socially dead.

What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.

My current job sucks so hard, black holes are going green with envy.

Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.

Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.

qtyzLX

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

Hvjutp

Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.

Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.

Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.

The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.

He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.

Against stupidity the (very) gods themselves contend in vain

We should be meticulous and particular in all the advice we give. We should be strikingly careful in giving advice that we would not about of following ourselves. Most of all, we ought to escape giving recommendation which we don't imitate when it damages those who woo assume us at our word.

If you think it's simple, then you have misunderstood the problem.

My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.

My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.

We've all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.

Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

Wit makes its own welcome and levels all distinctions.

Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.

HvICqA

I took a course in speed reading and was able to read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It's about Russia.

The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown.

Sometimes, the best answer is a more interesting question

Pray, v.: To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.

JFGiTRp

I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.

I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it.

Gigerenzer's Law of Indispensable Ignorance: The world cannot function without partially ignorant people.

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

Everything is drive-through. In California, they even have a burial service called Jump-In-The-Box.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.

Men have become the tools of their tools.

Fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run.

Invading Iraq after 9/11 was like invading Mexico after Pearl Harbor.

Black holes are where God divided by zero.

It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... 'til you can find a rock.

The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.

You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.

Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up.

Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.

Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn't over until everyone gets their cookies.

As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air — however slight — lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.

The company doesn't tell me what to say, and I don't tell themwhere to stick it.

The company doesn't tell me what to say, and I don't tell themwhere to stick it.

If you can read this you're not aiming in the right direction.

So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said 'You've been promoted'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said 'You've been promoted again'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I Said 'I careered off the road.'

So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said 'You've been promoted'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said 'You've been promoted again'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I Said 'I careered off the road.'

I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.

Don't be so humble - you are not that great.

QnNSBud

UNIX is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

Man has no right to kill his brother. It is no excuse that he does so in uniform: he only adds the infamy of servitude to the crime of murder.

Sex is like air. It's only a big deal if you can't get any.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.

The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.

The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.

Oh for pity's sake. HERE. Two pebbles. Two more pebbles. FOUR pebbles. What is WRONG with you people?

As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air — however slight — lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.

We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees.

The graveyards are full of indispensable men.

Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... 'til you can find a rock.

Democracy is where you can say what you think even if you don't think.

I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.

A committee is a group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.

I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.

The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the question of whether a submarine can swim.

saxFPrs

The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?

There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.

Don't sweat the petty things, just pet the sweaty things.

A good sermon should be like a woman's skirt: short enough to arouse interest but long enough to cover the essentials.

I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.

I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn't.

LPoMNSo

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

Behind every great fortune there is a crime.

Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism.

Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.

Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.

A lady came up to me on the street, pointed at my suede jacket and said, 'Don't you know a cow was murdered for that jacket?' I said 'I didn't know there were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too'.

DxdVqA

tSfQCPUL

Because I do it with one small ship, I am called a terrorist. You do it with a whole fleet and are called an emperor.

O'Toole's Corollary of Finagle's Law: The perversity of the Universe tends towards a maximum.

Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.

Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.

If you are going through hell, keep going.

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.

I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said 'You've been promoted'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said 'You've been promoted again'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I Said 'I careered off the road.'

Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.

Linux is like living in a teepee. No Windows, no Gates, Apache in house.

An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.

An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.

If the United Nations once admits that international disputes can be settled by using force, then we will have destroyed the foundation of the organization and our best hope of establishing a world order.

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

HIYLPRo

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.

The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

LvhdUsu

Politicians are like diapers. They should be changed often, and for the same reason.

If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn't get bigger or heavier.

The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.

If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.

About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.

Ask people why they have deer heads on their walls and they tell you it's because they're such beautiful animals. I think my wife is beautiful, but I only have photographs of her on the wall.

But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near.

But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near.

No one can earn a million dollars honestly.

Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.

zFHxjsDW

When I am dead, I hope it may be said: 'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.

EBAXNxyT

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three of them.

I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three of them.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.

About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.

Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.

All rights left. All lefts reserved. All reserves removed. All removes right.

Many journalists have fallen for the conspiracy theory of government. I do assure you that they would produce more accurate work if they adhered to the cock-up theory.

Raymond's Law of Software: Given a sufficiently large number of eyeballs, all bugs are shallow.

I agree with the reforms, but I want nothing to change

I agree with the reforms, but I want nothing to change

The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.

YEAlKQC

Is your argument that the Creator of the Universe was working under a deadline and His manager forced Him to rush inefficient designs into production?

A man begins sneering his discernment teeth the senior time he bites eccentric more than he can chew.

The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.

It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.

Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them.

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.

Man has no right to kill his brother. It is no excuse that he does so in uniform: he only adds the infamy of servitude to the crime of murder.

Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.

There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.

Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.

A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.

A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.

To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.

Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.

Computer /nm./: a device designed to speed and automate errors.

The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by loading honors on your head.

If there is no Hell, a good many preachers are obtaining money under false pretences.

They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.

A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.

C++: an octopus made by nailing extra legs onto a dog

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.

We should leave our minds open, but not so open that our brains fall out.

Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.

I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it.

Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.

Some men, in order to prevent the supposed intentions of their adversaries, have committed the most enormous cruelties.

Finagle's Law of Dynamic Negatives: Anything that can go wrong, will -- at the worst possible moment.

A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic.

UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.

Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them.

The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible.

The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents.

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.

Hi! I just wanted to say your web site is one of the nicely laid out, most inspirational I've come across in quite a while. Thx! :)

Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.

DOS Computers manufactured by companies such as IBM, Compaq, Tandy, and millions of others are by far the most popular, with about 70 million machines in use worldwide. Macintosh fans, on the other hand, may note that cockroaches are far more numerous than humans, and that numbers alone do not denote a higher life form.

But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near.

To jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war.

To jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war.

To jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war.

Hello! cgbefee interesting cgbefee site!

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.

KPmSsAi

LTvrCUOD

Sterling's Corollary to Clarke's Law: Any sufficiently advanced garbage is indistinguishable from magic.

Sterling's Corollary to Clarke's Law: Any sufficiently advanced garbage is indistinguishable from magic.

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.

Because I do it with one small ship, I am called a terrorist. You do it with a whole fleet and are called an emperor.

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance

I agree with the reforms, but I want nothing to change

Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.

ujrvkduu

zspBGK

In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.

In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies.

An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.

An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.

To be a upright benign being is to procure a kind of openness to the in the seventh heaven, an ability to trust aleatory things beyond your own restrain, that can lead you to be shattered in unequivocally exceptional circumstances on which you were not to blame. That says something exceedingly weighty thither the get of the honest autobiography: that it is based on a conviction in the unpredictable and on a willingness to be exposed; it's based on being more like a shop than like a sparkler, something somewhat fragile, but whose very item beauty is inseparable from that fragility.

If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough.

If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.

Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.

Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.

My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

Real life is that big, high-res, high-color screen saver behind all the windows.

Real life is that big, high-res, high-color screen saver behind all the windows.

In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is.

Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love .

Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.

I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

If a man does his best, what else is there?

MJBeTLr

No one can earn a million dollars honestly.

Devlin's First Law - Buyer beware: in the hands of a charlatan, mathematics can be used to make a vacuous argument look impressive. Devlin's Second Law - So can PowerPoint.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by loading honors on your head.

I just bought a Mac to help me design the next Cray.

The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.

Why did God create dentists? -- In his infinite love, he thought it would be charitable to His creatures to let them see what Hell is like, during their lives.

The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.

I could not possibly fail to disagree with you less.

I could not possibly fail to disagree with you less.

If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?

If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?

jajqxfjzxqblwrrwfubl, http://www.oubfdbswqy.com fidofekkba

jajqxfjzxqblwrrwfubl, http://www.oubfdbswqy.com fidofekkba

gYdAbfF nGqVMxu

... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.

It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren't, then I'd be a teacher.

Computer /nm./: a device designed to speed and automate errors.

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance

I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.

LJEnrYo [url=http://yofwdm.com/]UmSfwP[/url]

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.

Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proven it correct, not tried it.

KxCpqKOW http://owopws.com/

Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love .

Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love .

Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism.

He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.

He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.

Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.

I enjoyed reading your blog. Keep it that way.

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.

The cynics are right nine times out of ten.

Statistics is like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive. What they conceal is vital.

Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.

A picture is worth a thousand words (which is why it takes a thousand times longer to load...)

I hate those men who would send into war youth to fight and die for them; the pride and cowardice of those old men, making their wars that boys must die.

Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.

Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.

Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female.

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.

And the clueless shall spend their time reinventing the wheel while the elite merely use the Wordstar key mappings

Should array indices start at 0 or 1? My compromise of 0.5 was rejected without, I thought, proper consideration.

Should array indices start at 0 or 1? My compromise of 0.5 was rejected without, I thought, proper consideration.

All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door.

Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.

Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.

Men have become the tools of their tools.

Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.

They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.

They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens

The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case.

If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check.

Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy -- the mother.

Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.

My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.

Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives

We don't make mistakes, we just have happy little accidents.

Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.

If you can read this you're not aiming in the right direction.

Testing proves the presence, not the absence, of bugs.

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.

It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood... War is hell.

The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible.

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.

For if he like a madman lived, At least he like a wise one died.

Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.

Your website is very great. I liked your website a lot. Thank you.

In this war – as in others – I am less interested in honoring the dead than in preventing the dead.

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.

Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.

Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.

Democracy is where you can say what you think even if you don't think.

It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren't, then I'd be a teacher.

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

A camel is a horse designed by a committee

Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.

ouHGxa

It's wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago.

It's wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago.

Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.

And the clueless shall spend their time reinventing the wheel while the elite merely use the Wordstar key mappings

And the clueless shall spend their time reinventing the wheel while the elite merely use the Wordstar key mappings

Write a wise word and your name will live forever.

If quantum physics doesn't confuse you then you don't understand it.

If quantum physics doesn't confuse you then you don't understand it.

RjKcntdt

Am I lightheaded because I'm not dead or because I'm still alive?

The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.

What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.

What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

A model is done when nothing else can be taken out.

Sterling's Corollary to Clarke's Law: Any sufficiently advanced garbage is indistinguishable from magic.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them.

My last cow just died, so I won't need your bull anymore.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.

Total absence of humor renders life impossible.

The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.

Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.

Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.

A poem is never finished, only abandoned.

When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.

The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case.

The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case.

The most important job is not to be Governor, or First Lady in my case.

It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.

I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.

Everything secret degenerates, even the administration of justice.

After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one.

digin it man lovin seein her gettin dick

The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.

The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.

You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.

A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.

I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.

Descended from the apes? Let us hope that it is not true. But if it is, let us pray that it may not become generally known.

Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.

2 + 2 = 5, for extremely large values of 2.

The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.

Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it

Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family too.

When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world.

When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world.

Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.

I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president.

I know that there are people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that.

I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.

[War] might be avoidable were more emphasis placed on the training to social interest, less on the attainment of egotistical grandeur.

I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.

To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.

I don't believe in the after life, although I am bringing a change of underwear.

Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.

The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.

Java, the best argument for Smalltalk since C++.

The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.

Subtlety is the art of saying what you think and getting out of the way before it is understood.

A poem is never finished, only abandoned.

I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.

I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them.

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.

I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?

The truth is more important than the facts.

The truth is more important than the facts.

If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?

If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.

About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.

Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF All my base are belong to you!

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.

Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.

If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check.

I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.

A radioactive cat has eighteen half-lives.

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

sxxzcv
jcvzx
rgzxcv
tyccvx
sdgvvv
cvxcv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] online bingo [/url]
sdfgzcv
sasdfasdf
kvvvvvvvvvvzxvcz
gfhasdfas
gfjaa
hscfgg444a
tyzcvv
sdh45fg
hjvvz
asdfasdfasdf
zxcvxdsf3425
hjkzxcv
dfxcvbxcvbrtywert
aszxcgcbvcbv
jkghfavvv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] free bingo [/url]

sxxzcv
jcvzx
rgzxcv
tyccvx
sdgvvv
cvxcv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] online bingo [/url]
sdfgzcv
sasdfasdf
kvvvvvvvvvvzxvcz
gfhasdfas
gfjaa
hscfgg444a
tyzcvv
sdh45fg
hjvvz
asdfasdfasdf
zxcvxdsf3425
hjkzxcv
dfxcvbxcvbrtywert
aszxcgcbvcbv
jkghfavvv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] free bingo [/url]

sxxzcv
jcvzx
rgzxcv
tyccvx
sdgvvv
cvxcv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] online bingo [/url]
sdfgzcv
sasdfasdf
kvvvvvvvvvvzxvcz
gfhasdfas
gfjaa
hscfgg444a
tyzcvv
sdh45fg
hjvvz
asdfasdfasdf
zxcvxdsf3425
hjkzxcv
dfxcvbxcvbrtywert
aszxcgcbvcbv
jkghfavvv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] free bingo [/url]

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.

sxxzcv
jcvzx
rgzxcv
tyccvx
sdgvvv
cvxcv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] online bingo [/url]
sdfgzcv
sasdfasdf
kvvvvvvvvvvzxvcz
gfhasdfas
gfjaa
hscfgg444a
tyzcvv
sdh45fg
hjvvz
asdfasdfasdf
zxcvxdsf3425
hjkzxcv
dfxcvbxcvbrtywert
aszxcgcbvcbv
jkghfavvv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] free bingo [/url]

sxxzcv
jcvzx
rgzxcv
tyccvx
sdgvvv
cvxcv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] online bingo [/url]
sdfgzcv
sasdfasdf
kvvvvvvvvvvzxvcz
gfhasdfas
gfjaa
hscfgg444a
tyzcvv
sdh45fg
hjvvz
asdfasdfasdf
zxcvxdsf3425
hjkzxcv
dfxcvbxcvbrtywert
aszxcgcbvcbv
jkghfavvv
[url=http://www.onlinebingofriends.com] free bingo [/url]

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... 'til you can find a rock.

Humor is just another defense against the universe.

Humor is just another defense against the universe.

Humor is just another defense against the universe.

It's dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that's successful enough to require a large and complex set of software

People who think they know everything greatly annoy those of us who do.

I'm not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.

The Bible was a consolation to a fellow alone in the old cell. The lovely thin paper with a bit of matress stuffing in it, if you could get a match, was as good a smoke as I ever tasted.

The internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a truck. It's a series of tubes!

Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

Invading Iraq after 9/11 was like invading Mexico after Pearl Harbor.

Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?

Everything that can be invented has been invented.

A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose.

A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.

Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.

I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

He managed to stupid himself right into the White House.

Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.

The internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a truck. It's a series of tubes!

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.

Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid.

The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney...

Not only is there no God, but you try getting a plumber at weekends.

If it wasn't for muscle spasms, I wouldn't get any exercise at all.

I'm trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass.

I'm trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'.

Yes, I'm fat, but you're ugly and I can go on a diet.

Yes, I'm fat, but you're ugly and I can go on a diet.

Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.

My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.

The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.

All rights left. All lefts reserved. All reserves removed. All removes right.

Java, the best argument for Smalltalk since C++.

Java, the best argument for Smalltalk since C++.

Everybody's worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there's a really easy way: stop participating in it.

Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.

If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.

No one can earn a million dollars honestly.

About the use of language: it is impossible to sharpen a pencil with a blunt axe. It is equally vain to try to do it with ten blunt axes instead.

The only difference between me and a madman is that I'm not mad.

If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.

It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.

I'm fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in.

I'd stop eating chocolate, but I'm no quitter.

Politically Correct UNIX System VI Release notes

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.

USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.

USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

One doesn't have a sense of humor. It has you.

Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'

I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

When you've seen one non-sequitur, the price of tea in China.

When you've seen one non-sequitur, the price of tea in China.

Just because bulldozers are used to build highways doesn't mean bulldozers are the best way to travel on a highway.

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter.

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.

Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.

Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.

There is no idea so simple and powerful that you can't get zillions of people to misunderstand it.

The truth is more important than the facts.

The truth is more important than the facts.

Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.

czintb

When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, 'Why god? Why me?' and the thundering voice of God answered, 'There's just something about you that pisses me off.'

A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.

Before C++ we had to code all of our bugs by hand; now we inherit them.

C++: an octopus made by nailing extra legs onto a dog

Real life is that big, high-res, high-color screen saver behind all the windows.

It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.

The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.

The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.

The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it.

UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.

UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.

I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.

The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.

We've all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.

Look at you in war. There has never been a just one, never an honorable one, on the part of the instigator of the war.

If there is no Hell, a good many preachers are obtaining money under false pretences.

The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

EBVmNN

Opportunities multiply as they are seized.

Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis.

Should array indices start at 0 or 1? My compromise of 0.5 was rejected without, I thought, proper consideration.

Because I do it with one small ship, I am called a terrorist. You do it with a whole fleet and are called an emperor.

Because I do it with one small ship, I am called a terrorist. You do it with a whole fleet and are called an emperor.

When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.

Devlin's First Law - Buyer beware: in the hands of a charlatan, mathematics can be used to make a vacuous argument look impressive. Devlin's Second Law - So can PowerPoint.

If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.

If Al Gore invented the Internet, I invented spell check.

Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.

A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.

I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.

Java, the best argument for Smalltalk since C++.

You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where she is!

You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where she is!

Be tolerant of the human race. Your whole family belongs to it -- and some of your spouse's family too.

Incrementing C by 1 is not enough to make a good object-oriented language.

When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.

Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.

Modern capitalism is not about free markets, it is about building sufficient mass that the market gravitationally collapses around you.

The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.

Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?

Computers are useless; they can only give you answers.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

MnzXeth

I'm not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.

Politicians are like diapers. They should be changed often, and for the same reason.

Politicians are like diapers. They should be changed often, and for the same reason.

The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins.

Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something.

Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.

Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.

Am I lightheaded because I'm not dead or because I'm still alive?

Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.

Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.